Wine NOT!

For all intensive purposes. I should still be in bed.  It’s Saturday morning.  I was a first class A #1 mommy this week and entertained the hell out of the four kids.  I deserve a sleep in.  Went out last night for drinks with my fun cousin and drank tequila drinks.  (Will post that in a minute.)  But I was dragged outta bed cause I got da beans on my mind…

BEANS BEANS BEANS BEANS BEANS BEANS BEANS BEANS BEANS BEANS BEANS BEANS

TWO days ago, Wedsnesday, I take a bag of dried black beans and I put them in the crock pot with water to soak for 24 hours.  Experts say, (some chick I googled) that if you soak them it removes some of the famous bean gas that everyone is talking about on the streets.  Anything to decrease the incessant toot factor in this house.  So I waited patiently until Thursday to let them soak, thinking of all the delicious things that that I going to do with those beans.  Violate them with cilantro, mash em around with some rice, mmmmmmmm beans….

Yesterday, bean process day 2, I drain them and I put them back in the crock pot on low and I watch.that.kettle.boil.

I checked those GD beans about every 42 minutes on the hour, I was so pumped.

Thor asked me about them before I went out last night , insisting that they looked ready, but they just weren’t quite there, I told him.  I let them go jjjuuuussttt a little bit longer.  When I stumbled into the house last night after my tequila playdate, the house smelled bean-y-licious.

I went upstairs to talk to Thor and he reminded me to turn off the beans.  He is so sweet…watchin’ over his babies beans…he’s just like that…I stumbled down again, cranked them off, got a big glass of water and passed out.

I awoke this morning with cramps, someone screaming about fruit loops and mmmmmm the smell of beans.  I think I was dreaming about them because I could actually smell them, wafting upstairs….WAIT.

I can smell them.

At this time, Thor comes into the room with the sheepish look.  You know that look.  Everyone has them.  Thor’s is particularly adorable.  He looks down at me.

Me: “What.”

Me: “What’s wrong.”

Thor: “Your beans.”

I should have "cranked" it off the the LEFT.

*Sigh.*

When I came down, Thor said, “Better blog that.”

It’s a constant wonder to be such an idiot.