Posts Tagged ‘sulfites

17
Oct
11

She Can Lift Her Head Off The Table.


Now that I have then strength to lift my head off the table, it’s time for me to fill you in on my sulfite-free FAD DIET progress.

Official status report: SUPERFREAKINAWESOME.

ok, so I have to admit, the first three days was like walking around carrying 3 bloated elephants wearing fat suits.  BRU-to the-TAL.  But I eventually got the rhythm of everything and I.FEEL.FANTASTIC.

Mostly, probably, because I am clean.  Not sulfites or booze for 8 days.  There is not one sulfite iota in me.  (Lie.  Our body makes natural sulfites.)  But I am not intentionally putting anything in me and I feel like I could fly.  (Apparently, there may be some traces of college-age LCD.)

Down 13 pounds, too.

I did have a major RA flare-up for 5 of those days, but that is because I was late taking my shot, thinking that I might not need it anymore.  Sometimes, I am a ridiculous person.

So, unnamed fad diet working.  I am not really hungry on it, that is the trick with it, I think.  But mostly, I see the others around me not GAINING and I think that is the whole key to this thing. Whatever, still not endorsing.  Still not divulging.  It’s really no big deal because the point is that I am clean and losing weight.  Once I get through this little test of endurance, I will be back to clean living and hope I can naturally and slowly lose the rest of the weight.  This, so far, is a nice springboard.  BOINGGGGGG………

I think one of the reasons that I am doing too well on it is because I am used to being already a bit deprived having a sulfite allergy.  I am used to having to make my food, even when I am really hungry.  It feels good again to know what I am putting in my mouth is good for me.

I have some recipes that I am going to pop up for everyone and some of them are quite delicious.  I just had me some chili that was scrumptious!!  Lots of chicken, lots of fish, ground turkey, some meat…yummy veggies and fruits.

Pros: feeling great, losing weight, not hungry, great feeling of accomplishment

Cons: I miss booze.

Come back later and check out some of the recipes.  I am going to type some up now.   Bon Appétit, sulfite-nots!

05
Oct
11

FAD DIET 101: Sure, I’ll bite.


Call me SpiderHead.


I have been absent.

I have been…not great.

I have been losing the war on sulfites and the HeatherWorld War on general good health.

I have been poked and prodded a lot lately, as well.

My liver is pissed at me (due to my RA meds), I gained a really large amount of weight in a short amount of time, I am exhausted and hypoglycemic.  My cholesterol jumped and my RA comes creeping in every once in awhile like a sneaky, angry bitch.  I am having thyroid issues and my body has decided to go on strike.

So there.

I am going to do what I NEVER usually do, and that is go on a fad diet.  I am not going to name the fad diet (1)because I am not endorsing anything I don’t believe in yet and (2) I don’t want to hear bitching from other people. (Please take note.)

I know that the best way for me to lose weight is a slow lifestyle change.   It worked for me before.  But I need a kickstart and quick.   (Did you SEE the photos of all 4 of my chins in the Winnetka Current article?)

I am about to enter my busy season:  lots of gigs and performances.  I need to be healthy, have energy and be able fit my fat ass into some serious formal wear.  It’s crunch time, bitches.

The diet is sulfite-free and very extreme, but I can do ANYTHING for a month.  Massive detox.  I will take one for the team and be a guinea pig.  And no one can talk me out of it.  I have gotten the approval of the diet from my endocrinologist and my Gynie, so I feel ok to press on. My dear friend just had much success on it and she  is going to hold my hand, as well as my cousin Apricot, who is doing it with me. Thor is being very supportive; I am bound to be a wildebeest for the next few weeks, so good luck to him.

So, here we go…I start this weekend, my goal is 20 pounds and if my thyroid issues prevent this from happening, which I have been warned they might, then onto the next thing.  Worth a try.

Will try to keep updated tabs…and post any recipes that we sulfite-nots can use.  Lots of fish, lots of chicken, lots of veggies and buttloads of water.  I am hoping to get my liver numbers and my cholesterol numbers down, as well as a good kick start.  Wish me luck, please send positive vibes and here’s hoping I can bring some helpful things to the table!

22
Aug
11

THE BLONDE CHILI ADVENTURE


*Please see bottom for photo analysis.

or otherwise known as How I Made Crockpot Sulfite-Free Chili Yesterday And It Took Me 12 Hours.  This is not the title of the recipe for a blonde chili, like, made with all yellow ingredients.  This is like, a blonde totally screwed up this recipe.  This easy, three step, a blind hamster could make this recipe, recipe.  Just to clarify.

We are not going to dwell right now on the fact that it took me an extra 4 hours to make this edible.  Let’s just not go there, because I am too menstrual to hover in the abyss.

This is a nice vegetarian, very easy and quick chili recipe…next time I am going to add some ground turkey and I am going to try really, really hard to do a better job.

Vegetarian Chili

Ingredients:

15 ounces kidney beans

15 ounces black beans

5 ounces white beans

1 can ORGANIC diced tomatoes

diced green chili pepper

1 cup organic chicken broth

1 tbsp chili powder

1 tsp cumin

salt and pepper as needed

Daisy sour cream to dollop on top before serving (IF you can manage this…some sulfite-nots cannot, so beware)

  1. The night before, soak beans separately, covering with water, overnight.  Make sure to pick out the ugly stepchild beans that don’t belong.  They can eventually make the end result mushy.
  2. Add the soaked beans in the crock-pot with the can of tomatoes, chopped-up chili pepper, chicken broth; salt and pepper.
  3. Let it sit there on low for about 8 hours, but please check on it.  You may need to add a bit more broth.  We don’t want a repeat of this, do we?


I am ready to talk about what happened now; Advil kicking in.  This chili was good, don’t get me wrong.  Thor not only took it to work the next day, but he had another bowl of it for lunch on Saturday, right in front of me.  I saw him put it in his mouth and he didn’t even spit it in the sink.  This is what actually occured.  When combining ingredients, I thought I was being cutesie and culinarily adorable** when I substituted a can of diced tomatoes.  I decided to just chop up a tomato and chuck it in there.  After checking on it at the 7th hour, it was like the Sahara on a bad day.

Not me. But...me.

Apparently, I needed the juice from the can and didn’t put extra water in the crockpot.  I quicky added a few cups of water and saved the bastard, but I telling you right now that it was a close one.  And this blonde needs a  I need a vacation.

********************************************************************************************************

*This drawing is reedonkulous.

Things that are wrong with this picture:

  • That’s supposed to be a pan with bacon and eggs. It looks like a tennis racket with an upside-down grumpy face.
  • I cant even eat bacon and eggs.
  • It looks like I am wearing 2 breast implants with a see-through skirt.
  • Don’t you hate it when you get black on the tip of your yellow highlighter pen?
  • I don’t look very upset.
  • I wish I was that skinny.

**culinarily adorable[adj]

cu·li·nar·il·y [ kúllə nèrr ill ee ] a·dor·a·ble [ ə dáwrəb’l ]

Sweet, lovable, endearing, huggable in the kitchen when substituting ingredients, thinking that is acceptable when you really just outright suck.

Last week while making pesto, Heather was culinarily adorable when she thought she could substitute 2 cloves of garlic with 4 cups of sugar. 

Sidenote:  In regards to my first caption picture: you can look at the word “analysis” 50 times and it STILL doesn’t seem right.  I mean it has the word anal in it and you don’t ever want to willingly use the word anal, unless you are talking about…anal stuff…especially when you are typing a recipe.

Was that Advil I just took?  Or 3 Vicodin?  Hm.

18
Aug
11

Blueberry Vinegar


My favorite thing about this pic is Cracker crying over smell.

I don’t normally “out” my kids on here with a picture,  but this could not be avoided.

I got this fun and easy recipe from recipe.com

Ingredients that you will need:

1 1/2 cups fresh bluberries

2 cups rice vinegar

2 tbsp honey

will need jar or bottle with non-metallic lid**

  1. Put the blueberries and vinegar in stainless steel or enamel saucepan. Bring to boiling; reduce heat.
  2. simmered, uncovered for about 3 minutes
  3. stir in honey
  4. remove from heat
  5. drain mixture with fine strainer, getting out all solid matter and toss all that crap in the garbage
  6. transfer the liquid to a clear bottle or jar.  If the cover has any steel on it, put plastic wrap (i sued a baggie over the top) then put the top on  and let it sit for 24 hours.

You need to store this in a cool, dark place and you can keep it for up to 6 months…make sure to remove any blueberries that may be left in there before you use.

Really nice and different taste for a light salad dressing mixed with a little EVOO…Mangi!  Mangi!

**I did a little research about this and it turns out that the acid in the vinegar will corrode any metal.

Veeerrrryyyy Interesting!!!!

//

18
Aug
11

My Kitchen Reeks.


MOM! WHAT THE H*LL!

The kids keep on walking in here from the backyard and they are like, “UHHH! GAAA!  MOOOMMM, WHAT IS THAT???”

What?

I’m just cooking.

Yesterday I made a really runny and watery batch of Cream of Asparagus soup and some Parmesan-encrusted baked chicken. The later was NOT sulfite-free so don’t get all excited.  The soup just totally pissed me off.  I couldn’t get it thickened up properly.  I kept on making little roux batches while repeatedly thinking,  “Shit, more flour???”  Finally, I  looked at it on the stove top and went like this to it and then left it there while I stormed out to work.  Thor dealt with it, God love the man.

When I came home, he was like, “I put your soup away.  It was good.  Was a little watery.”

Today, the reason why my kitchen reeks is because I made blueberry vinegar. WORD!

I really did!

And it doesn’t blow!

It’s rice vinegar-based so I should be able to tolerate it.  Will post the recipe that I got from Recipe Magazine in a minute.

I am crossing my fingers that it will be yummy in 24 hours  and ready to mix with a little EVOO and salad.  Yummers!

I am also making a vegetarian crock pot chili -so easy, so sulfite free.  Hope it doesn’t blow up and end on my kitchen ceiling.  Will post that recipe soon as well.

In conclusion, besides burning my children’s lungs and making a pissy, wussy batch of soup, I am really cranking around here, peeps.

THIS IS MY 50th POST!! WEEEEEEEE!!!!!!

19
Feb
11

Goal of the day: Do not stroke out.


Oh yeah.
So I go on Enbrel and my RA is amazingly in remission.
Dude. I RAN up the stairs the other day.
Thor said, “Heather. You just ran up the stairs.”

OHMIGOD!
Cool!

But for some wack-a-doo reason, my blood pressure is freaking out. AlrightalrightalRIGHT.  STOP LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT.  Ok.  I have been cheating, people. A teeeeeeeeny bit.  I admit it. I thought I would test out the waters since I have been on the new meds.  I got a little cocky and decided to shove some ion SO2−3 in my mouth.  See what happens.


Funny.  It didn’t look like this in the grilled cheese sandwich I shoved in my mouth.

 

I think all this evil sulfite compound is doing is shaving important hours off of my life. I called my loving, adorable and very talented Dr.Mike (and Facebooked him.  Oops. He might just kill me at my appointment on Monday. Stay tuned for the results.) and he is going to fix me up but good.
I also talked to my Rheumy nurse to rule out this as a side effect of Enbrel and she said no but she was concerned about my BP (it’s hovering constantly around 160/107) but she told me to just take it easy this weekend…“lie in a darkened room and relax all weekend until you can get in to see Dr. Mike.”)
Oh, that’s rich. HA.  HA HA.  Stop….stop making me laugh…snorting….my rock hard abs hurt from laughing so hard….milk spittake ensues.
There is no resting in a dark room.  Not over here at the residence of  666 Chaos Lane, in CrazyHeatherville, USA.
I am a mother of three wild children, a vocal recital to run today…overnight guests coming and and a lacrosse game, just to name a couple of things on my dance card for the next 24 hours.
DAMN YOU, Regal Theatre movie pretzel with a side of cheese!
I CURSE YOU, baloney sandwich on Wonder Bread white. (Oh, hot dayum, that tasted good.)

So I am medicating myself with advil and much later, in my darkened room, a glass or 2 of wine.

*********************************

Is my BP high from the food?

We will see. I am going cold turkey and see if it will come down.  Is my body just really pissed at me because I am taking Enbrel and it won’t let me swell?  So now it like, ok bitch ,that’s how you want to play it….ZAP!  (blood pressure spike HERE!  and HERE!….and just when you think it’s going down to normal…HERE!)

I do have a really swollen lymph node in the armpit of my….armpit….lovely, no?  And it really hurts.  I feel like crap so I might just have some little bug. Enbrel basically kills my immune system and kids have been sick all around me this week.   Seriously.  Like one kid at a Valentines party sneezed right on me.  It was all over my arm.  Gag.  That, and Alpha sneezed on the butter the other day.  I mean it.  For reals.

Wish me luck, wish me willpower, wish me to live through the day…happy weekend everyone!

04
Feb
11

Pump Fake (quite literally)


Today was my training with Thor for my first Embrel injection.

What we learned today:  I am a suckass wimp.

And so is Thor.

I had to go in to get my first shot shot today of this new biologic drug that is supposed to not only make me feel better, but basically make me symptom-free.  Which is just about perfect timing as yesterday I was calling friends to see if anyone had a cane lying around that I could borrow to walk around.  Jeez, Louise.

So we get there and because insurance is so annoying, they had to give me a sample.  They get me all prepped, (Thor was supposed to give it to me but he “assured” me that it was probably best and easier if I do it a.k.a.  Thor=pussy.)  Alright, so he’s not a pussy, he is very sweet,.  I am just trying to make myself  look better.

So I have to drop my pants

and get up on the table with Thor and Dr. Rheumy and Nurse Nice.  (She is very nice and helpful.)  Dropping trough in front of strangers is never fun.  And I wished that I hadn’t worn “that” underwear.

My rheumy is french and rather, well, hot.  And she is a very, very smart blonde and I have a feeling she can also really cook.  So she is trying to instruct me how to do it and I have to take the alcohol swab and rub it in a certain direction and then I do it but I bump my hand on it and I have “contaminated” the area we has just swabbed so we have to re-swab and well, there were a lot of disappointed french sounds being uttered but she was being as patient as she could be with a blonde trying to give herself her first injection.

And do I finally and do and it was cake! So Easy!  Didn’t hurt in the least!

Cause it was defective.

Total dud.  Absolute pump fake.  HEY!  Sue that pharmaceutical salesmen and let me kick his ass because now we have to wait another 10 minutes for the next sample to cool down and do shove it in my other thigh.

I put my pants back on and Thor and I stared at each other for another 10 minutes.

I know it worked the second time cause it freaken hurt.  And it takes about 15 seconds for it to all get in there so yeah, ow.  But I am a warrior and I plowed through.

“Oh Embrel, course through my body, heal all wounds and swollen joints, help me walk pup the stairs without tripping and falling into the wall.”
So far, so good.  I seem a bit more tired than usual, but I am not bleeding about the eyes and ears and that’s all that really matters.  The only really important thing is that I cannot get sick.  Really.  Like, don’t sneeze near me or touch me if you have an infection or rub on me if you are pussy or leaking anything.  And really just don’t ever really rub on me in any situation.

I was worried because I have heard that the quick pen version of how my meds are injected has preservatives in it but so far, so good.  I have read where some sulfitenots use the version of the drug where they have to mix it themselves and shoot it that way and that is just a little bit too Sid and Nancy for me, so I hope this one works…

I still have to stay on my steroids for now, and i think they mask a lot of my sulfite reactions, so I will continue to gain weight as I have been cheating and sneaking some little things here and there.  Like blonde oreos…cause…well…you know…

Happy weekend to all!
XO

Heather

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Heather Moran

Crazed sulfite-free woman.

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